Crazy Wife · The Undad · Trent and I · Weird thing I Care About

Friggin’ Toilets

This may come as a surprise to you, but The Undad and I fight.  I know, I know, I recently wrote about how he’s been working on becoming my perfect partner, but the reality is we fight.  He’s human. I’m human.  He has expectations.  I have unrealistic expectations.  He’s a weirdo.  I’m, well, an over achiever that dabbles in hypocrisy with my expectations for others when taking into consideration my own actions.

We fight about money.  We fight about personal time.  We fight about cleaning.  Mostly we fight about cleaning. Who does it? Who doesn’t? How should it be done? When should it be done? When I was pregnant with the Bean I spent 9 months praying to the porcelain gods and every time I peered over the edge of  a not quite pristine toilet bowl, I’d lose my mind on Trent, but not before  losing all my chunks first. Why can’t the friggin’ toilets just clean themselves? And what the heck is that stuff that collects at the waterline? Disgusting.

Over the years we’ve considered getting our house cleaned.  When we were DINKS (duel income no kids), when I was pregnant, when The Undad was losing his mind from overwhelming responsibility early in my return to work, and more recently when we discuss my want to spend more time with Bean when I’m home, and less trying to share the cleaning burden with Trent.  We always talk ourselves out of it.

A couple of months ago The Undad got an e-mail from Mad Maids asking if he’d be interested in getting his house cleaned.  Would he? Would he like a million dollars? Would he like a hand job when ever he thinks about hand jobs? Would he kill to eat whatever he wanted and still be able to maintain a Playgirl ready hot body? Hell yes he would like his house cleaned!!!  We booked an appointment.  Mad Maids has this cool flat rate pricing based on how many bedrooms you have in your house.  So our one bedroom house would be $119 plus $50 for a finished basement.  I have NO idea if this is a better price than other cleaning services, but I appreciated not having to email or phone for a high pressure quote.

Last Monday, despite the fact that both Trent and I were battling some stomach bug we woke up early to prepare to depart with Bean for a few hours.  We had received awesome email and text reminders from Mad Maids to let us know when they would be arriving, and specifics about our booking.  When the cleaning team arrived, Bean and I headed across the street to the park, while Trent conducted a detailed tour including all of the Toddlerfied nooks and crannies of our home, and what to do with Mr Boobers (the dog) at the end of the cleaning.

As I watched the cleaners carry in their gear from the park, I became increasingly giddy.  “My house is getting cleaned.  My house is getting cleaned. My house is getting cleaned.”  Monday was better than Christmas! You know, until I started throwing up in the park.  Between the stomach bug and the excitement I got to have a totally unexpected, ridiculously inappropriate, entirely embarrassing celebration in the park.  Trent drove over to pick me up as I continued to vomit and Bean squealed with joy.

We headed to West Edmonton Mall.  Insert Mom brag right here –> are you ready for it?!  My kid sat through Zootopia! 1 hour and 50 minutes including previews.  My kid is a 19 month old rock star!  We were so unbelievably proud of him!

Coming home to a clean house was like an adult easter egg hunt.  We went running through the home to celebrate rarely clean areas.

This sink usually is filled with the remnants of past meals.
This is the bathroom tap in “Trent’s bathroom” it never looks like this.
This is the toilet from “Trent’s” bathroom. It never looks like this. Never. It’s a miracle.
This is my corner office. I usually have piles of paper here.
This mirror is usually covered in greasy diaper cream finger prints.
This is a soap dish that is no longer covered in soap scum.
This is the shiny shiny shiny tap in our bathroom.
This is where all body hair (including the dogs) gather to build a nest for future use.
This is where my biggest dust collection is usually displayed.
This is what our bed looks like when made.
This is one of the gigantic mirrors in my home that has never been finger print free.
This is where my dust bunnies reside. Mad Maids found a new home for them.

The Undad ran into the kitchen “holy crap you should see the sinks!” I ran into the bedroom “the bed is made. Trent ran into the living room “you should see the bookshelf, it’s almost dust free.” I ran into the bathroom “woah, look at the toilets!”

Truthfully, if it wasn’t for a few missed areas we would have been sold on finding a way to scrounge up the dollars to do this every month.  I think every home has those nit picky areas you hate to clean.  For me it’s: 1. The mirrors (check, Mad Maids cleaning team rocked this!) 2. The super finicky light fixture in the kitchen (this baby was probably dusted, but needed some extra love to get through the layers of ick I haven’t scraped through previously). 3. The bookshelves (we have a lot, these were mostly dust free – we have too many knick knacks ). 4. The shelf we use to display photographs on the way down to the basement (this shelf wasn’t touched.). 5.  The dried up leaves from under my plant area (they were still all there, sad sad dried leaves).

Mad Maids are online savvy, and have lots of convenient options.  They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee, so I know all of my nit picky things from above would have been sussed out if it wasn’t for the fact that our awesome house cleaning extravaganza was a gift to The Undad.  I really loved that there was no hassle with the booking, and that I had all the details I needed in all followup correspondence.

Mad Maids, for a limited time, has set us up with a $20 off code you can use to try any of their services.  Just enter the promo code UNDAD20.  Don’t think of it as a luxury, or an expense.  Think of it is the next step to a happy marriage.  There’s so much more opportunity for love, when your feet are sticking to applesauce remnants on the kitchen floor!

*we totally received a free house cleaning, but as you can see this would never impact the information I chose to share.





One thought on “Friggin’ Toilets

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s